Guys aren’t really that complicated.
Have you ever been at a party and wondered why no guys are interested in you, even though you could have sworn this one cute guy was looking at you, and another guy keeps bumping up against you, and some other dude just asked you where the bathroom was?
Maybe you’re just missing a signal (or a bunch of them). Sometimes guys have weird ways of showing they’re into you. Rarely do they just stroll up and announce their interest (and the ones who do usually tend to turn out to be fuckboys.)
If you’re worried about misreading a cue and thinking a guy is attracted to you when he’s not, stop worrying. Sure, there’s always a possibility that a guy you think is throwing you subtle hints isn’t actually trying to flirt with you at all. But what have you got to lose? Open yourself up to the possibility that guys do like you are are flirting with you, and you’ve got everything to gain.
You don’t have to do anything big or potentially embarrassing. Just smile and throw out a little small talk; if he likes you, things will naturally flow from there. Even if he doesn’t, he might start to like you once you work your flirty magic. And if neither of those turns out to be the case, who cares? You’ve just sharpened your flirting skills a little for the next guy who is into you.
Here are nine subtle things guys openly admit they do to show they’re interested in you…
1. He looks at you
You could be at a party, or at the bar, or just riding the train to work, when you get that weird sixth sense that someone’s looking at you. You look up and he looks away, or pretends to look past you. But a few minutes later, you catch his eyes drifting your way again. Just a coincidence? Unlikely.
On a Reddit thread asking guys how they show girls they’re interested, CloverKO said, “I constantly look at them. Not for a long period of time, but I’ll continue to glance at them until we make eye contact and I can smile at them.”
2. He gets closer to you
Maybe you saw him across the dance floor at the club, and suddenly he’s just down the bar from you. Next time you look up, he’s standing right next to you. When a guy likes you, he’ll find a way to migrate until he’s in your general vicinity.
“I’ll find ways to be closer to you,” explains another Reddit user, adding “not in a creepy way.”
So if you notice a cute guy making his way over toward where you are, you can go ahead and assume it’s not an accident.
3. He finds excuses to walk past you
A step up from the “getting closer to you” tactic. Where is he going? Maybe he’s getting a drink, maybe he’s going over to talk to a friend, maybe he’s just going to the bathroom – but he always seems to be brushing past you for one reason or another.
Take it as a hint that he’s hoping you’ll notice him and say hello, and before he runs out of excuses to get out of his seat!
4. He gives you a goofy smile
You know that smile guys do, where they keeps their lips clamped together, trying not to give you the full-on toothy grin and trying to play it a little cool? Yeah, that one.
“I usually have a slight grin and become a lot more playful/joke around with them. I personally had no idea I did this, but my friends started noticing it and told me,” says a Reddit user who seems to be adorably lacking in the self-awareness department.
5. He does the ‘drive-by hello’
When he’s too shy to actually plant his feet next to you and say hello, he’ll do the ‘drive-by hi’, where he keeps moving and gives you the cool-guy “hey” as he cruises past.
Why not just come talk to you? Maybe he’s having an inner monologue similar to Reddit member seanathan19, who says when he likes a girl, he thinks, “I should tell her I like her, I should ask her out, I should do something! Instead, I decide that I’m not good enough and she’s better off without me and remain sad and alone.” Awww.
6. He tries to act cool
You might hear this guy talking to his friends just a little too loudly, or see him frowning at his phone just a little too intently as he tries to sound cool, or look important. Whenever you look over at him, he makes a show of being busy or important, or like the life of the party.
Is he showing off for me? you might think. Yes, yes he is.
7. He lifts up his shirt
This might not sound so subtle, but a guy who likes you will find a way to play it off like it’s an accident. He might make a show of getting hot and taking off his sweater, then ‘accidentally’ pull up his undershirt along with it.
Or maybe he’ll use the corner of his shirt to wipe up a spilled drink, or to dab his forehead, which is sweaty from nerves, because he LIKES you.
8. He finds a reason to talk to you
Look – a guy is probably not going to come right out and tell you he’s into you. He may not even have the guts to strike up a conversation or ask you for your number. But he’ll still find a way to talk to you, even if it’s to ask you where the bathroom is, or if you’ve seen where the bartender went.
“I start wanting to talk to them every excuse I get. No matter who says something, I want to somehow make it about that girl,” admits another Reddit guy.
9. He gets super flustered
When a guy likes you and finally gets up the guts to talk to you for real, it’s not uncommon for him to get a little nervous.
“I act awkward around [girls I like] because my brain forgets how to function normally around [them],” explains another Redditer.
So if he trips over his tongue, or maybe his actual feet, give him a break. The dude is probably way into you.
If you find it hard to approach guys, and you generally assume they’re not interested, remember that many guys feel the same way. Here’s what a Reddit user who’s so shy, he’s since deleted his account, has to say about the way he acts around a girl he likes.
“Completely freeze up, never know what to say, always hope she’ll make the first move. And I wonder why I’m still single…”
Have a little pity – and go on and make the first move.
Images via tumblr.com, giphy.com, warnerbros.com, paulmccartney.com, and jezebel.com.
Comment: What are the little things you notice guys doing when they’re trying to flirt with you?