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Charlie Sheen’s Most Bizarre Interview Yet

Are you a fan of Two and a Half Men? Sorry to tell you but production of the show has been cancelled for the rest of the season thanks to Charlie Sheen’s latest bizarre rant.

CBS say they’ve had enough of “Charlie Sheen’s statements, conduct and condition” and after checking out his latest radio interview I understand why!

He delves into what he calls his “porn family”.

“Let me say this about the Goddesses, I don’t think the term is good enough, but when you’re bound by these terrestrial descriptions, you must use the best term available. So if you think about it dude, I’m 0-for-3 in marriage, but like in baseball, the scoreboard doesn’t lie. Never has. So what we all have is a marriage of the hearts. And to sully, contaminate, or radically disrespect this unit with a shameful contract is something I’ll leave to the amateurs and bible grippers.”

Then he unleashes hatred on his ex-wife Brooke Mueller.

“Good-bye, Brooke, and good luck in your travels; you’re going to need it. Badly.”

The highlight of the interview is his admission that he has set himself straight and not rehab:

“I have cleansed myself. I closed my eyes and in a nanosecond, I cured myself… It’s the work of sissies. The only thing I’m addicted to is winning. This bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, reports a 5 percent success rate. My success rate is 100 percent. Do the math … another one of their mottoes is ‘Don’t be special, be one of us.’ Newsflash: I am special, and I will never be one of you! I have a disease? Bulls**t! I cured it with my brain, with my mind. I cured it, I’m done … you don’t look like you’re having a lot of fun. I’m gonna hang out with these two smoking hotties and fly privately around the world. It might be lonely up here but I sure like the view!”

“I’m sorry, man, but I’ve got magic. I’ve got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time — and this includes naps — I’m an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.”

Are you a fan of Two and a Half Men and does the news that it’s been cancelled because of Charlie Sheen upset you?