Today’s topic is single mums. They really are an incredible, almost unbreakable species. Many have capabilities that take womanhood to a whole new level. Yes, there are some who would be very comfortable in a place suited for the Bogan Hunters, but it’s the successful storm-trooper type I’m talking about. Carer, kids, home and they seem to have it all under control, plus have time to join the PTA! Seriously, hats off to you ladies, you really make other women look pretty bloody ordinary.
Regardless of what you might think, single mums do differ from partnered ones. If you’ve ever had a time in your life when you’ve been a single mum, you’ll understand why I say this. Think about it. There’s no one to vent to at the end of a long hard day or discuss how you’re going to move forward into the future. They can’t turn to a partner at 3am and say “Can you get that?” when the kids have woken up for a feed or with a nightmare or a wet bed. Nope, they are on-call 24/7.
Now being a single mum isn’t something most women aspire to be when they are young. Can you imagine that pretty little picture? I want 3 kids under the age of 7 by the time I’m 35, try my heart out in a relationship which is doomed to fail and would then prefer their dad to nick off so I can raise these kids on my own! Mmmm. Not exactly a goal for an easy life!
Sure, some women do opt to be single mums, but that is generally before they are in the thick of it. Like many other things in life, the only way to fully comprehend a situation is to experience it. The reality of life as a single mum is tough, hard work, an absolute endurance, exhausting and all those other adjectives which describe a situation when the work of an entire village is taken on by one woman.
Ironically, married or partnered women tend to stay as far away from this single mum crew as possible. Have you ever wondered why? I’ve thought about it and it actually became pretty obvious. It’s possible that partnered women view single mums as a threat or they see their future and seriously want to avoid looking in that direction.
So let’s look at the first scenario. The single mum as the threat. A threat to what you might ask? Well, everything! Single mums are SINGLE. Strike one. Only confident, trusting or should we say naive women will introduce these types of single mums to their partner.
Not only to they support themselves, dress their kids in designer clothing and footwear, have homes which resemble a photo opportunity in House and Garden, but they are usually quite lovely people and to top it off, many are outstandingly gorgeous. Keeping everything afloat, they manage to stay fit and healthy and radiate confidence, independence and all the other attributes men find irri-bloody-sistable!
For many, the only reason they are single is out of misfortune and bad luck. Partnered women are aware of this and in their quest to retain their lives, they avoid introducing Ms Perfect to their partner. Not that she would go for most of them anyway, but partnered women won’t take that chance. They have grown accustomed to their lives and intent to keep it.
That brings us to threat number two. The single mum can be a vision of the future for many women in unhappy, soul-destroying relationships. If they choose to ditch their partner, this is the type of single mum many of these ladies will need to become. Looking this harsh reality in the face can be daunting and scary. How on earth will they manage to do it?
The reality is many women they know they can’t and hence remain with their partner. These women would rather remain in their crappy relationship than opt to be a single mum. Granted, most know very little about their lives because they avoid them at all costs, bag them for their life choices, ostracize them in the school yard and other family involved functions, yet when it comes to actually being one, they strategically opt out.
So being a single mum is not for the faint hearted; partnered women will avoid you, men look your way and ogle, plus you are responsible for the kids 24/7. Still, many seem to pull it off with the grace and charm of a princess. What can I say but well done ladies, keep up the good work!