Today is the perfect time to start fresh.
Have you already forgotten your New Year’s resolutions? Join the club. In fact, I think I may have even forgotten to make them this year. But no matter! We don’t need a new year to start a new habit – or put a stop to an old one.
Is there something you’ve been planning to do “someday,” but someday never comes? As my good friend Jessica said to me the other day, “someday is yesterday.” So let’s do this already.
Not sure where to start? Here are 13 resolutions anyone can make at any time. And even better, not one of them involves giving up sugar or going to the gym.
1. Mind your own business
Are you a chronic people-pleaser? Do you have an advanced degree in codepedency? If you think it’s your job to take care of everyone else – that you know best, and people need your advice – then chances are, you’re not only making the people around you resentful, you’re making yourself miserable. Resolving to keep your nose out of other people’s business and worry only about yourself is guaranteed to make life more peaceful all around.
2. Spend less time online
Have you heard? Social media is killing your relationship and making people hate you. Okay, maybe it’s not that dire – but it’s true that we all spend far too much time glued to our screens. It’s almost like we’re addicts. Set aside a couple of hours every day to unplug and live entirely IRL. You might just get addicted to life offline.
3. Assume good intent
Are you quick to take offense at any small comment anyone makes? Do you enjoy calling people out when they say something that could be interpreted as offensive or insensitive? Is your social media feed full of rants and rage posting? If so, here’s a question: what would it look like to give people the benefit of the doubt? To believe that they mean well, and are coming from a good place? It’s called assuming good intent, and if you make it a habit, it’ll change your life. Guaranteed.
4. Practice better self-care
When I say self-care, do you automatically think of bubble baths, wine, pedicures, and Netflix binges? Sure, sometimes that’s what self-care looks like. But other times, self-care means getting your work done so you won’t fall behind and feel stressed, deactivating your Facebook account, or paying the bills so you won’t end up with late fees. Taking good care of yourself can take many different forms.
5. Put yourself first
As women, we’re conditioned to take care of everyone else first, and put our own needs last. But that airplane warning about putting on your own oxygen mask before assisting others is true. If you don’t take good care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else. That means paying attention to your own needs and advocating on your own behalf. It’s not about being selfish. It’s about survival.
6. Ask for what you want
How many times do we sit around feeling resentful that we aren’t getting something we need, when we never even bothered to ask for it! Maybe we think we won’t get it anyway and are afraid of rejection. Maybe deep down, we don’t believe we deserve it. Or maybe it just didn’t occur to us that we could ask for what we want. The time to start asking is now.
7. Learn how to fight
Conflict is an inevitable part of every relationship. There’s just no way around it. So if you care about your relationship, you’d better get good at dealing with it. That means learning the rules of fighting fair, and knowing how to recover after a fight. If your fights tend to feel toxic, resolve to change that, starting now.
8. Get good at forgiving
Have you heard that saying, that not forgiving someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die? It really is true. Holding a grudge and nursing your resentment against someone doesn’t hurt them; it hurts you. If forgiveness is hard for you, this is the perfect time to get better at it. Mindfulness, meditation, and simply setting the intention of learning to forgive can all help with this.
9. Get more sleep
If you’re getting by on less than the recommended seven to nine hours of sleep a night, you’re not operating at peak capacity. The benefits of a good night’s sleep go far beyond being able to stay awake during that afternoon staff meeting: you’ll look younger, feel happier, burn calories more efficiently, and make fewer mistakes.
10. Start a skincare routine
Taking your makeup off before bed is not a skincare routine. There are so many amazing products available now, you’re doing yourself a major disservice if you don’t take advantage of what’s out there. Whatever your issue – sun spots, pimples, fine lines – there’s a product out there created specifically to address it.
11. Spend more time with your girlfriends
Have you drifted away from your friends since you’ve been in a relationship? Part of holding on to your identity once you’re coupled up is maintaining your relationships outside of your partner. If you’re single, maybe you’ve been a little hermit-like and are spending way too much time alone. Reconnecting with your girlfriends is always a good idea. Send your best girls some of these quotes to brighten their day – and then plan a girls’ night, ASAP.
12. Throw more parties
You don’t need an excuse to throw a party – and you don’t need a perfectly clean apartment, either. All you need are a few friends, something to eat and drink, and maybe a little music. Anytime is a good time to get together with friends and get more comfortable hosting them in your home. And who can’t get behind a resolution to party more often?
13. Be open to magic
This time of year, between Christmas and Valentine’s Day, can be rough. The days tend to drag, there may not be much to look forward to, and if you’re blue because you don’t have someone special in your life, the approach of V-Day doesn’t make things any easier. But remember: none of us knows what’s going to happen tomorrow. Or even in the next hour. Read these sweet love stories to be reminded that there really is magic in the world.
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Comment: What resolutions do you need to make right now?