27 Thoughts Every Woman Has Had Waiting For A Guy To Text

May 3, 2017

Maybe he got struck by lightning…?

We’ve all been there.

Don’t even try to deny the fact you’ve at some point in your life acted like a complete crazy person checking your phone relentlessly and silently willing it to go off with that coveted response from the guy you just started seeing.

Us women have a small (okay, HUGE) tendency to over-examine the hell out of everything; especially when it comes to dating, which can make waiting for a text response feel like a form of torture second only to finding out you just missed out on the last dress in your size at an ASOS flash sale.

And when that mental torture happens, it tends to go a little like this…

1. Okay, it’s been an hour now…he probably got tied up with something at work.

2. Wait, wasn’t he supposed to be on lunch break now??! Why isn’t he responding?

3. THREE hours? Really? Come on, dude. I KNOW you’ve looked at your phone at least once by now.

4. Okay, I’m officially an insane woman. I just checked my phone for the 56th time. Switching this thing off!

5. It’s been a while now; he’s probably replied…better just super quickly switch it back on so I can respond.

6. That’s weird…still no response…maybe I should restart the phone…it’s probably just not working properly…

7. Screw this guy! It’s officially been over five freakin’ hours and still no response. NO ONE is that busy.

8. *Feverishly scrolls through boy contact list* Who else can I text flirt with to distract myself?

9. OMG he replied!

10. Oh wait. No, it’s Jeremy, the guy I went on a date with two months ago…he wants to meet up…

11. Oh screw it. Still no reply. That’s it. I’m texting Jeremy back.

12. A quick check of his social media couldn’t hurt…maybe something’s happened to him? Better investigate…

13. A pic drinking a beer an hour ago on his Insta?! Are you serious???

14. What. A. Douchebag.

15. Okay, I am better than this. I don’t deserve a guy who can take the time to snap his freakin’ beer but can’t send a few words response to let me know he got my text.

16. Did I do something wrong? Like, I thought we were having an amazing time together and now all of a sudden he’s too busy to text?

17. Does he not see that I am goddamn Grade A girlfriend material? I couldn’t be any more perfect for him if I tried.

18. I’m so into him. Crap. He’s in my head now, I can’t stop thinking about him!

19. OMG did my last message sound bitchy because I didn’t add that wink face emoji I was tossing up over?

20. Should I send an explanatory follow-up text? He’s probably pissed at me because my last text was so cold. That’s gotta be it…

21. *Spends an hour drafting the perfect text and having several girlfriends provide feedback on it* Okay, here we go with the follow-up text…

22. *Phone pings* OMG it’s him! I didn’t need to send a follow-up after all.

23. *Excitedly opens text and reads* ‘Heyyy’ – that’s it??!

24. It took him the best part of 24 hours to craft that one word response?!

25. It’s official. I will never understand men.

26. Even still…I think I’m going to text him back…

27. FML.

Comment: Have you experienced a similar inner monologue when waiting for a man to text you back?


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