4 Hacks For Getting Into BDSM If You’re Shy

April 5, 2019

Don’t get tied up in the taboo (or, maybe do…). 

BDSM can seem a little scary at first. It can be hard to know where to start.

The misconceptions and stigma surrounding it may leave you feeling a bit nervy, but it’s all about baby steps. If whips and chains excite you but you’re shy as hell, there’s no need to fear. There’s no need to proceed straight to level 100.

Let’s face it, most of us tire of keeping it vanilla in the bedroom, and bondage is an easy way to spice things up by introducing risk and restraint (after all, who hasn’t imagined being tied down in a naughty daydream or two??). But before you grab the nearest necktie, here are some hacks you should know about bondage to help you get your kink on…

1. Talk before you tie

If you’re just starting out, it’s a good idea to get a grip on what tickles your fancy. Explore what kind of eroticism excites you and communicate it to your partner. A conversation about consent may sound like a buzz kill but in the long run, both you and your partner will have a better idea of how to add excitement without overstepping any boundaries. So before you get caught in cuffs, have a convo, you won’t regret it.

EDITOR RECOMMENDATION: Lovehoney All Tied Up Bondage Play Kit (8 Piece)

 

Why you need it: This is the ultimate BDSM kink kit. This 8 piece set is completely beginner friendly and has everything you need for exploring eroticism.

Get it HERE. 

2. Take it slow

Exploring BDSM in the bedroom can be exciting but be sure to check in with your partner and take things slow. If you’re shy and not sure where to start, try slowly introducing a little spank here and there to start figuring out what you’re into. BDSM is a process of trial and error and it takes time to discover what turns you on. Be patient and stick with it. You’ll be hot and heavy in no time.

EDITOR RECOMMENDATION: Weekend in Bed Bondage Kit and Game (8 Piece)

 

Why you need it: Got plans this weekend? You’re going to want to cancel them. This board game is a great way to slowly introduce bondage to the bedroom.

Get it HERE.

2. Safewords are sexy

Open communication is key in safe and consensual BDSM. The more open you are with your partner about what you do and don’t like, the more enjoyable the experience will be for both of you. Be respectful, pick a safeword and stick to it. There’s no shame in using it. Make sure to check in with your partner after as well. A little debrief goes a long way.

EDITOR RECOMMENDATION: Bondage Boutique Black Bound to Please Under Mattress Restraint

Why you need it: Who said being tied down was a bad thing? This restraint is a bondage staple and is perfect for adding a little risk (and reward) to your sex life.

Get it HERE.

4. There’s no shame in being shy

Since 50 Shades of Gray, BDSM has piqued the curiosity of many but it’s nothing like the real thing. There is ZERO shame in vanilla sex but it’s important to note that a little kink never hurt anybody. Bondage is a fun way to spice up your relationship and own your sexuality. Don’t be afraid to dip your toe in.

EDITOR RECOMMENDATION: Lovehoney All You Need Bondage Kit (20 Piece)

 

Why you need it: If you’re ready to get down and dirty, this kit is a must-have. Recommended for the more experienced bondage babes but hey, go hard or go home.

Get it HERE. 

Images via lovehoney.com and tumblr.com.

Want More?

Have our best reads delivered straight to your inbox every week by subscribing to our newsletter.

SUBSCRIBE

 

You Said

Comments

Win a holiday to Bali
Win a brand new Audi