From erotic literature to sex toys, human beings are always looking for new and wacky ways to get in the mood and stay there. Sex is (aside from music) the universal language, and whether we admit it or not, we’re wired to want it.
However, sometimes, for whatever reason, your body and mind decide they’re going to work against you, not with you. The result? You can wind up a libido-less mess with no idea how to get back in the saddle. And that old anxiety isn’t going to help you achieve the big O.
Fortunately, there are ways to work through this wholly temporary problem. Sexual health therapist and relationship counselor Desiree Spierings says getting your sexual groove on is as simple as finding the right spots. And she’s not talking about your usual neck or nipple stimulation. Here are seven erogenous zones you never knew existed…
1. Your lips
“Lips are very exposed, and on top of that have a lot of nerve endings, 100 times more than our fingertips,” explains Spierings.
So if you’re having trouble getting in the mood, a good long make-out sesh will definitely do the trick.
2. Your cervix
A cervical orgasm, or tantric sex, is one of life’s most elusive pleasures. Spierings defines it as, quite literally, a full body orgasm.
“Full body means it’s not linear, as a clitoral orgasm is. It sends waves all through your body from head to toe. Also unlike a clitoral orgasm, it can also last for hours instead of seconds. You can achieve it via deep penetration, softly touching the cervix. Initially it may be a bit uncomfortable, so it’s important to feel very open, safe, and relaxed with your partner.”
3. Your feet
There’s nothing quite so relaxing as a foot massage, and Spierings asserts it can also be a pretty sexy experience.
“There are pressure points in the feet that are believed to be able to trigger sexual arousal. If nothing else, it can help you relax after a hectic day and get you in the mood for more.”
So there’s another way to con your SO into massaging your feet; tell him it will, according to science, turn you on. He’ll be at your service in a second.
4. Your scalp
If you’re partial to a scalp massage, Spierings has good news.
“The skin on the scalp has nerves that are very sensitive to touch and stimulation. Massaging the scalp will release feelgood hormones and can create a tingly feeling all through the body.”
Because scalp stimulation increases blood flow all over the body, it’s not only deeply relaxing, but can definitely get you in the mood for more.
“What is nice about it is that it seems so innocent. You can do it in public, but it still feels extremely intimate and even a bit naughty,” adds Spierings.
5. Your arms
Ever wondered why having your arms stroked feel so good?
“The arms are a perfect way to start foreplay. You can sit on the couch and start stroking them, slowly moving up and down, and even starting to kiss them there. This is a gentle way to get in the mood for more,” explains Spierings.
This will work on your SO as well, so get out those sleeveless shirts…
6. Your stomach
“A woman’s abdominal muscles are connected to her vagina, which is why women can even orgasm from doing simple core exercises,” says Spierings.
“So even though many women may feel insecure about that area, it would be great if they could let go and enjoy the pleasures it can provide as well. “
7. Your hands
The hands, most pointedly the fingers, are actually more erogenous than you’d think. You know how pain is always more intense when you do something to your fingers? The same applies to pleasure. There are a huge amount of little nerve endings there, making them ideal for foreplay.
“Fingertips have a sensitivity second only to the mouth and genitals,” explains Spierings.
“What would feel good, is gently pulling on the fingers and sucking them suggestively.”
Daisy is a writer, actress, and outspoken feminist. She has a peculiar fixation with tennis and often shouts, "Vamos Rafa!" at inappropriate moments. Harry Potter is her spirit animal. Follow Daisy on Twitter and Facebook.