Anyone else is just wasting your time.
There’s a man you should wait for when it comes to relationships, and he’s worth every second.
Annoyingly, he won’t be the first guy you think he is. He probably won’t even be the second or third. Those guys will promise you the world, and then you’ll find out they don’t actually own it to begin with.
But in those first few heady weeks, you’ll think it has to be him; you’ve never felt like this about anyone before. “He’s different,” you think. “What we have is special.”
No, it isn’t.
You’ll know he’s not your man when that little niggling feeling starts. That tiny murmur, like a little flicker in your stomach that flutters its way up to your chest. It will make your heart skip a beat, but this time it won’t be because of the butterflies he gives you. it’s the first seed of doubt setting in.
But you’ll ignore it, because no relationship is perfect.
You’ll start bickering, nitpicking, tiffing and getting miffed over the smallest of things. Then the anxiety will settle in. Will you argue tonight? Will you say something that will upset him? Has he had a bad day? Is he in a foul mood? Before you know it, you’re walking on eggshells, turning your life upside down and yourself inside out to be the you that he wants you to be.
This man is not for you. He makes you not you.
You’ll sleep with a few men because you’ll feel like they could be him. But when he’s putting his pants back on and talking about how early he has to get up for work, you’ll know it’s not him.
Don’t waste time trying to make these men into your man. They’re pleasant (or sometimes not so pleasant) detours on the road to the him; but don’t stop for too long or you might miss him.
Here’s the man you should wait for.
The man you should wait for will still fight with you, but together you’ll learn how to fight. You’ll know you don’t need to resort to insults and screaming to be heard, while simultaneously feeling like you don’t have to push your feelings down to the pit of your stomach anymore.
The man you should wait for will make you want to be a better you. Rather than defending yourself from a barrage of criticisms, you’ll aspire to be the best you you can be. That’s the effect he has on you; you’re more you than you’ve ever known.
He will make you feel calm, like you don’t need him to reassure you or to give you the moon. When he’s around, you feel like you could reach up there and grab it yourself.
The man you should wait for will change the way your mind works. He will open you up to thoughts you’ve never pondered in ways you’ve never conceived. You’ll be somehow both out of your comfort zone and more comfortable than you’ve ever been. The most important part of your exhilarating mental journey is that no matter how far you travel, this time you won’t lose yourself along the way. This time you’ll find yourself and you’ll think how strange it is to discover who you want to be when there’s someone else beside you, rather than when you’re alone.
Wait for the man whose love terrifies you, but in a good way. In the way he makes you realise you can’t just dip your toes in the water but you have to jump in head first from the diving board so tall that the pool below looks smaller than a postage stamp. And you’re deathly afraid of water… and heights. But you’ll jump anyway; the funny thing is, you won’t even think about it.
Wait for the man who shows you kindness. Who may not always agree with you but will always listen and make an effort to understand. Who will think of your feelings as if they were his own, and fight fiercely yet tenderly to protect them. Wait for the man who will tell you the truth, but with a gentleness that sees you always open to hearing it.
This man, the man you should wait for, makes you want more for yourself. Every time you look in his eyes you see his belief in you shining back. He will never let you become complacent or take yourself for granted because he knows what you’re capable of when you don’t. The man you should wait for will have a special way of challenging you so it feels not like criticism, but like a dare to be phenomenal.
So, now that you know him, wait for him. Don’t waste your time on dating those who seek to fritter your precious seconds away because it suits them. On those who don’t invest in you. On those who pull you ever so subtly down to raise themselves up.
Wait for him.
You so deserve him.
Images via shutterstock.com and giphy.com.
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