There’s a reason more couples are opening up their marriages…
What couple hasn’t fantasized about having a three-way at some point? Men love the idea of watching their wives get down and dirty with another woman, and didn’t every woman go through a lesbian phase in college, or at least flirt with the idea?
But as common as this fantasy is, most couples don’t actually act on it. Only around eight percent of heterosexual couples have had a threesome, according to research psychoanalyst Paul Joannides, author of The Guide to Getting It On. He says there’s a difference between fantasizing about inviting someone else into your bed and actually doing it, and stresses the importance of knowing exactly why you want to have a threesome – and discussing it thoroughly with your partner – before you go there.
“Talk to your partner ahead of time about some of the things you hope will go right, and some of the things that could go wrong,” Joannides tells Greatist. “This way, if surprises happen, you and your partner will be better prepared to deal with them.” Set out your expectations from the start, make sure everyone’s boundaries are clear and will be respected, and keep the lines of communication open.
Entered into in the right spirit, a threesome has the potential to be the best thing that ever happened to your relationship. Here are seven reasons to try it…
1. You’ll have fun
Put aside any worries you have about marital fidelity, or whether or not it’s “moral” to have a three-way, and imagine how amazing it would feel to have another woman go down on you. No matter how good your man is, he’ll never know his way around down there as well as a woman does. And haven’t you always wanted to know what it’s like to go down on another woman? Spoiler alert: it’s super fun. Once you’re a few orgasms in, you’ll forget whatever concerns you might have had initially.
2. You’ll see your partner in a new light
Remember when you were a kid and got tired of your toys, and then when some other kid came over to your house and started playing with them, you suddenly got interested in them again? Yeah, exactly. Hearing another woman moan with pleasure while your man touches her – and seeing her drive him wild in return – will make you remember why you wanted him in the first place. A little bit of jealousy is healthy for a longterm relationship.
3. You’ll learn new tricks
Once you’ve been married for a while, it’s easy to fall into a routine. You know your way around each other’s bodies and can make each other come quickly and efficiently; why fix what isn’t broken? But you know what they say: variety is the spice of life. Even if you think your sex life is perfectly fine, inviting someone new in will open your eyes to new pleasures and techniques that you can use long after your third party has left the bedroom.
4. You’ll satisfy your man’s biggest fantasy
Every man dreams about having a threesome. Even if he’s never mentioned it, even if you think he’s “not that type,” even if he seems satisfied with your sex life; he’d still be down for a three-way. He probably is satisfied with your sex life – but go ask him about bringing another woman into your bed, and watch his eyes light up. You think he loves you now? He’ll really love you after this. Plus, you only have to do it once to provide him with fantasy fodder to years to come.
5. You’ll feel closer to your partner
Lots of women worry that inviting someone else into their marital bed will create a crack in the foundation of their marriage – and that’s totally understandable. If your marriage is on shaky ground, it’s probably best to work on things before you bring someone else in. But if your relationship is solid, then spicing things up by having a three-way can actually strengthen your bond. It’ll be a shared adventure; a hot little secret the two of you have from the rest of the world.
6. You’ll reawaken your sex life
If things have gone stale in the bedroom – maybe you aren’t even having sex at all anymore – this can be a surefire way to spark things up again. Keeping sex hot in a longterm relationship can be challenging, but if you want your marriage to last, it’s essential. Trying new things and living on the edge a little might be exactly what you need to save your relationship. And if it doesn’t work, then at least you’ll know you gave it your best shot.
7. You only live once
Do you really want to go to your grave without knowing what it’s like to have hot, wild sex with more than one person at the same time? It’s not just men who harbor fantasies of three-ways. What straight woman hasn’t gotten off to lesbian porn before? Let’s be honest. Once you let yourself indulge in your fantasies, you’ll wonder why you waited so long. And doing it with your man as your partner in crime only makes it more fun. So what are you waiting for?
Images via weheartit.com, tumblr.com and giphy.com.
Comment: Do you have an open marriage or relationship? How has it worked for you?
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