Nice girls don’t get rich con’t

October 4, 2005

Nice girls don’t get rich con’t

With each passing month Allison had not only a clearer vision of what she wanted but also an idea of what it would take to achieve it. She began saving money so that she could leave her job and have enough to pay for her basic necessities. Within three years of considering the fact that she could live her life differently, she was. She did resign from her agency, found shared office space, and hung her therapist?s shingle. Today she has a thriving practice, put $30,000 into savings and other investments last year, works four days a week, keeps Fridays open as her ?spirit? day, and has travelled throughout France and England. And it all began with a laser-focused vision.

Mistake #2 – Not playing to win
If you?re not accumulating the amount of money you need to be financially independent, ask yourself why. Are you better at playing the role of ?nice girl? than you are at playing the financial game? You don?t need an abundance of testosterone to be competitive, but you do need a burning in your belly to live the life you want, not the life you have. Once reason why men are more likely to be wealthy than women is that they know what it means to play the game to win.

I sometimes play golf with children. Even in a game like golf, where you?re really playing against yourself and the course, boys play far more competitively than girls. The boys will consistently shave points off their scores by taking mulligans (a free second shot following a shot that was played poorly). The girls count each and every stroke to the point where they become discouraged with having such high scores. When I say something to the boys about their scores not being an accurate reflection of how they played the game they typically shrug it off with, ?It?s just a game.?

Men bring this same willingness to win at all costs to their financial lives. It?s gotten more than a few men into trouble (think HIH, Estate Mortgage etc.) but generally speaking, playing the game to win means you are more likely to walk away with more than you would if you simply played like a girl ? fair to a fault, polite, and more concerned with how others perceive you than with winning. One of the basic precepts of negotiating is that those who ask for more going in walk out with more. And there?s nothing illegal or unethical about expecting to walk away a winner.

By Lois P. Frankel
This is an extract from the book ‘Nice Girls Don’t Get Rich – 75 Avoidable Mistakes Women Make with Money’. Warner Business Publishing, 2005.

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