Looking for a datable man and continue to attract the do-able variety? Well there is a secret between the do-able and datable man and it’s high time single ladies knew the difference. It’s not about how hot he is and it’s not about the amount of money in his bank account. The do-able man might have everything you want on the surface, but under that attractive exterior you just may find there’s something seriously missing.
The first thing you need to look at is if the man you’re interested in has loyalty. The stats suggest that one third of people cheat and for many of us this is a deal breaker. So, will this potential partner cheat on you? There’s the million dollar question! I’ve been round the block a few times and there’s a fairly easy way to tell if you’ve got a loyal man in front of you, or if you’ve got a player.
For one: the do-able man will lie, while the datable man will be honest. Sure, the datable man may not have the gift of the gab and may stubble around his words a little, but that’s not the only indicator; so it’s about looking past the words and seeing if they have any merit. For example: is that awesome car out there really his – and just as importantly, did he really pay for it? Or is it his mates in which he is passing off as his own, or perhaps a gift from mum and dad and he’s basically using it as bait to get you into the sack. Hey, this stuff really happens – and what’s more, it happens more times than you think!
Apart from being truthful, loyalty can be seen in how they treat the people around them, starting with how they are with their friends. You probably won’t see eligible men with family members until later, so close friends are the next best indicator. You need to ask yourself: are they respectful, kind, truthful and thoughtful? Or do they come off like an arrogant a-hole even if they say it’s just in fun. There is a difference in how loyal men treat their friends and it’s a great indication of how this man will treat his lady. Particularly if the lady in question ends up being you.
The second and most significant thing to remember is that words are only words, ladies! A datable man will back his words with his behaviour pretty much every time. The do-able man won’t. For example: did he really lose your phone number after a date or a hook up only to never get in contact again, or did he move hell and high water to reach you in some way, shape, or form because he really wanted to see you again?
The datable man will do that even after a woman has had sex with them. Ladies who find themselves chasing after some man no matter what hard luck story they’ve been given are just kidding themselves. You clearly mean less to him then you’d prefer, and in these situations, women set themselves up for a fall.
Lastly, an interested man will track you down, want to spend time with you and will treat you like a princess no matter what obstacles stand in his way. Whether it be distance, finance, relationship status, whatever; just ask any male you know if this is true and you’ll find that this is the case in most datable men. Once a datable man has his sights set on you and you would like to start a relationship, nothing will hold him back. Nope! Not even if he’s shy. It may take him a bit longer to get around to it, but eventually most datable men will go after what they most desire.
That’s when you know you have a datable man in front of you. The do-able man may have everything on the checklist like the looks, the car, the job and the bank balance, but seriously, how many of them are there that have everything you really want? The datable guy probably won’t, but if you find a man with honestly, respect and loyalty, you’ll have a pretty happy life together.
Image via persuasivelitigator.com
Kim is a writer and SHESAID's resident psychologist. A self-proclaimed tomboy who understands more about relationships and men than she ever will about glitz and glamour. Follow Kim on Google+.