Behavior

Grieving For Loved Ones Over Christmas

Have you been feeling a bit off and can’t put your finger on why? Sure, life is pretty hectic with everyone wanting to get ready for the silly season, but what if it’s more than that? For many people, the lead up to Christmas is a time when they experience grief without being consciously aware of it.

Unfortunately, grief is something we all experience and the realization of lost loved ones is most prominent when families gather at Christmas. For most, it will be due to the passing of a loved one. Tragically, for others it will be the devastation that a loved one is missing. Either way, there is a significant loss and Christmas time can surface emotions which are out of our control.

Regardless of the circumstances the first Christmas is always the most extreme. This is a time when grief is raw and emotions are fragile. It is a very personal experience, so some loved ones will grieve much longer and far more profound than others.

As the years pass by it can get a little easier, however, upon the lead up to Christmas some people aren’t aware of why they experience changes. This can also happen upon the lead up to birthdays and anniversaries. Individuals may get upset easily or feel lethargic, tired, irritated or depressed. It’s a strange phenomenon which happens to many people and is difficult for individuals to comprehend. All they know is that they feel bad, but can’t put an explanation on why.

Strangely, after these events pass, this feeling eases. However, it’s during this time that individuals may experience changes in their behavior. These include insomnia, changes in appetite, loss of desire, plus some may partake in erratic behavior like consuming too much alcohol, taking drugs or gambling.

It’s when routine behaviors shift, that they can indicate symptoms of much deeper issues. So if someone is sliding into altered or unhealthy behaviors, there is usually a reason why. Instead of focusing on the behavior, you need to look past them and acknowledge the underlying feelings and emotions that are causing them.

Once these are identified, the feelings and emotions can be addressed. In most cases, it’s grief rearing its ugly head. It’s an exceptionally uncomfortable emotion and people avoid it any way they can. Instead of avoiding grief, it is an emotion that is best tackled head on. The only way to do this is to acknowledge it for what it is. That may be easier said than done because there is no right or wrong way to grieve. There are only healthy and unhealthy alternatives.

Below are some recommended healthy alternatives to survive times such as Christmas, birthdays and anniversaries, when grief mysteriously appears.

1. Acknowledge grief for what it is.
2. Put extra focus on maintaining your mental health.
3. Eat properly.
4. Avoid alcohol and drugs, including irregular prescription medications, like Valium.
5. Get extra exercise.
6. Know that it’s ok to cry.
7. Talk about your loss and the feelings associated with it.
8. Do things which make you feel good.
9. Avoid isolating yourself.
10. Ask for help if and when you need it.

Lastly, if you or someone you love is overwhelmed with grief, please seek medical assistance. There may be something else wrong, which is masking itself as grief, so if unsure, make an appointment with a GP so they can run tests and make referrals to specialists if required. Look after yourselves and your loved ones and comfort each other in times of need.

Image via preludetoamidlifecrisis.files.wordpress.com

December 7, 2014

Men’s Mags And Female Orgasms

Most men’s mags are filled with images of women in sexy lingerie, right? Wrong! Sure, some mags are all about the images but, if you take a sneak peek to see what men are really reading about and looking at, you may get a startling surprise. It seems some men are reading up on ways to become better lovers and partners.

What fabulous news for the ladies! Some mags go into detail about how foreplay is essential for women to achieve orgasm, what positions are better for women, how and where to find the elusive G spot, ways to make sex last longer – the list of how to improve the sexual experience for women is endless.

Who knew? It’s not all about T and A, as many women believe. Then there’s also heaps of news, interviews, cartoons, comedy, jokes, sports commentary, heath and fitness, nutrition, entertainment guides, technology, cinema and gaming reviews, finance, fashion and grooming advice; plus sexual health – men’s and women’s.

Even mags like Playboy and Ralph seem to contain far more information than most women would anticipate. So, next time you find a men’s mag in your man’s bathroom or on his web history, don’t panic. The age-old excuse of “I’m just reading it for the articles” just might be the case and can be totally beneficial for you and your relationship.

This made me think about the differences between what women are reading, compared to men. Take SHESAID, for example. How many articles have you seen about how to give your man the ultimate sexual experience? Something like a step-by-step guide teaching women how to perform oral sex. Uh, none! Why is that?

Is it because women think they know what they’re doing in the bedroom and beyond; are men easier to please, sexually, than women; do they find other stuff more interesting; or more importantly, is it just not being published? Would women like to know more about how the male body works and how to make your man’s toes curl?

Judging by the response to articles on SHESAID about improving a couples sex life, the use of sex toys, different positions, etc; women probably would like to know more, about how to wow their partner. Men are obviously reading up on it, so why shouldn’t the ladies?

So, if you what to know more about how to perform an erotic massage, strip tease or pole dance; stick with us! Great sex is something couples should both work toward. As they say, variety is the spice of life; so we are going to get busy! Plus, if there’s anything else you want more info on, tell us! We always love to hear from our audience.

Image via http://www.teachmedia.org

October 16, 2014