Unlucky in love, or plain shit at online dating?
Everyone wants a kick-ass dating profile, right? Well, apart from having an awesome pic with your smiling mug on it, you really need to focus on your wording. Despite us all being highly visual creatures who predominately look first, people who are serious about wanting a relationship will take the time to read about the person in front of them.
Unfortunately, this is where the battle of the sexes reignites yet again. The opposite sex don’t always agree with what the other assume is a positive trait. Why? There are heaps of English words with multiple meanings. For example, when single ladies describe themselves using words such as strong, they assume it’s telling a prospective date that they’re independent, self-reliant and resilient.
While other women are often in awe of ladies who confidently describe themselves as strong, this little adjective can be a major turn-off for men. In fact, some men claim that when they spot words such as strong on a dating profile, they can’t click away fast enough. To them, this word – and words with similar meanings – are simply code for pushy, demanding and domineering.
So how do you get across who you are without scaring away prospective partners? Luckily, I’ve got some tips for you on how to produce a kick-ass dating profile. Just follow these simple guidelines and it should help you present yourself better and give you options to describe who you are in more accurate detail.
Tip 1: Be honest
There’s nothing worse than a liar in the game of love. So if you’re serious about finding that special someone then you need to be completely honest. Start by using an image of yourself and keep the editing to a minimal. Don’t Photoshop yourself down to a large breasted skeleton or buff yourself up to be a body builder if your not. Instead use an image which accentuates your best assets and you can’t go wrong.
The same principal applies to the wording. For example, if you don’t earn a six figure salary or model swimwear don’t claim to. Why? The key thing to remember is that good solid relationships are based upon trust and respect. So if you lie about yourself from the get-go you’ll basically be screwing up any potential for a long-term relationship.
Tip 2: Choose the right image
If you really want a serious relationship, you need to put some effort into it. Ideally make sure your profile picture is the very best image you have. Think about what you want your image to say about you. Don’t just upload a selfie quickly snapped in front of your screen. Go that one step further and put some thought into what you want your first impression to say about you.
Tip 3: Carefully select your wording
Although it might be tempting to describe yourself using a few generalized words such as masculine or independent it’s much better to give these words some thought before you commit to using them. To do this I’d recommend reviewing each one using a Thesaurus. Yeah I know this may sound tedious. Yet by doing this you’ll be able to describe yourself much more accurately plus leave less scope for misinterpretation.
I’ll give you an example using the word independent. Below are some synonyms (words with similar meaning) directly from thesaurus.com.
- on one’s own
Additionally, thesaurus.com provide a list of related words:
Notice that there are multiple meanings of this word and some of them aren’t exactly complimentary? Instead I’d recommend selecting more appropriate and specific words from the list. For example if want to use the word independent to describe that you’re self-reliant or self-sufficient use the more accurate words because they are far more descriptive about who you are.
Additionally where possible provide more detail along with the adjectives you use to describe yourself. Take the word enthusiastic for example. What are you enthusiastic about? A serial killer could be enthusiastic to seek his next victim but if your enthusiasm is more akin to gardening then adding this additional information will help you find a more suitable partner.
Well that’s about it. If you’re completely honest, choose the right image and carefully select your wording you’ll create yourself a kick-ass dating profile and be well on your way to meeting that special someone!
They say actions speak louder than words, but when it comes to online dating, the words we use in our profiles can have a serious impact on our appeal to the opposite sex, according to eHarmony.com.au. In a study of 12,000 members, it uncovered the words that are most likely to attract attention from compatible singles, as well as those that might turn them off.
For men, adjectives like perceptive, physically fit and passionate are more likely to see women initiate conversations with them, while the terms quiet, energetic and respectful can have a negative impact on their dating profiles’ appeal.
Women who use words such as sweet, funny and ambitious receive more approaches from the opposite sex, while words like spiritual, quiet and romantic fall flat.
And these extra approaches are far from insignificant. Perceptive and physically fit men attract between 58-143% more interest from women who want to get to know them better; whereas sweet, funny or ambitious women get between 28-38% more approaches.
eHarmony’s Marie-Claire Ducharme Sayers said:
“Both men and women respond more favourably to positive and extroverted terms, while quiet or modest descriptors are shown to have an adverse effect on the attractiveness of a dating profile.
“While there is evidence to show the words you use can have an impact on how you’re perceived by the opposite sex, eHarmony matches its members based on core personality traits and values, which, when it comes to great dates and long-lasting relationships, is really what matters.”
Top 10 best words to use in an online dating profile
- Physically fit