*Names have been changed to protect the not-so innocent.
Never judge a book by its cover.
It’s like getting an online shopping package delivered, but 10 times sexier.
Do you know how to give the ultimate blow job? Well, there’s not a one-size-fits-all, step-by-step guide that anyone has come up with yet that can satisfy everyone, so why bother! What we are going to tell you is if you want to make his toes curl, the ultimate tip is to talk dirty to him and ask him while you’re down there. There’s not a man alive that has said, “I wish she wouldn’t talk dirty to me.” He knows what he likes, way more than we do, so we don’t need to go there.
Instead, we’re going to offer ways to improve your performance and technique. Stuff like how your attitude affects your performance, ways to reduce that annoying gag reflex, swallowing, spiting alternatives and using peppermint – all to make the experience better, for both of you.
Let us introduce, the Ultimate Oral Sex guide.
The No.1 way to boost your performance is in your attitude. It doesn’t matter if you suck like a damn Hoover, your man wants to feel like you are loving it down there and the entire experience is irresistible to you. Image if the tables were turned and he had a half-assed attitude, like he was doing you a favour, or worse he didn’t really want to be there and it totally grossed him out. It wouldn’t exactly be a turn-on.
If there are certain things you don’t like or want to do, you need to think about what they are. Either find a solution, get used to giving very mediocre oral sex, or opt out all together and just don’t do it. Sex is about enjoyment for both of you. Your brain is your largest sex organ, so it’s no surprise that giving an incredible blow job needs to start here.
2. Reducing the gag reflex
Now we’ve covered your attitude, there’s lots that can be done to reduce the gag reflex. The key is remember to breathe! The gag reflex is primarily to stop us from choking, so if you are getting oxygen into your lungs, this will reduce it.
Remember, practice makes perfect. Some women have fixed really bad gag reflexes by practicing. The more you practice, the deeper you will be able to go. Other women have recommended throat numbing sprays, like the ones dentists use or sex products specifically designed to reduce the gag reflex. There’s a wide variety of options available.
Position is another key element. Some positions make it better, while others can make it worse. If it’s a problem for you, then finding the right position may be a solution. Also, being in control can be another factor. If your man’s hands are on your head, it takes away your control. You may need them off your head, so bind them up, then you can be in complete control of how deep and fast you go.
3. Swallowing and spitting
Oh, the million dollar question – what to do when he comes? Semen has an unusual taste and texture, so it’s a personal preference whether you swallow it or choose another option. If your man really likes you to swallow and it’s the taste that is the turn off, add some flavoured lube or tasty spread, which will reduce the flavour. Another tip is to have his penis deep in your mouth, so it basically shoots down your throat without touching your taste buds. This is where sprays might come in handy.
If the thought of swallowing is totally out of the question, don’t beat yourself up about it. There’s lots of other things you can do, just before he comes. For example; a popular one to finish him off, is by rubbing his penis between your breasts as you squeeze them together or you could finish him off with a hand job and direct him to come on your body somewhere. Mix things up a bit, get creative and don’t let the prospect of not being able to swallow be the one thing that affects your attitude.
If you want to give him a real treat, plus help with the taste, suck on a peppermint or gargle some mouthwash, just prior to oral sex. It will give him a tingling sensation when it comes in contact with his delicate skin. Make sure the actual peppermint doesn’t touch the skin, because it can burn and irritate. This won’t only work for him, but will also feel similar to you, so get him to try it next time he’s heading down there.
We’ve aimed to focus on the most significant things that affect performance. Of course, there’s so much more to it. If you have some secret tips you’d like to share, don’t be shy, we’d all love to hear about them.
Image via http://www.sexverhalensite.nl
Dress up and meet your partner at a bar, club or cafe and chat them up taking on new names and persona. Express the playful side and see if your discover something new about your partner by taking on a new role.
Sharing your sexual fantasies can bring a new dimension into play, if you feel embarrassed by this read Nancy Friday’s books on erotic fantasies for men or women.
Learn to do a strip tease for your lover by doing a dance routine, finding music that turns you on, soft lighting and dress up in layers so you are able to undress using the tease as the main theme.
Q. What’s the single most important thing a woman can do to have a great sex life?
A. Having great sex starts with ourselves by feeling turned on and erotic. Often we project onto our partner that they have to turn us on which means that we are always looking outside of ourselves. To feel sexy and sensual, to expand into pleasure and orgasms we need to be able to go inside relax and enjoy, through this we can have great sex without expectation and pressure.
Q. What can I do to overcome the hurt of a past relationship so I can move on?
A. As a sex and relationship therapist I do think that counseling is important because it gives people the opportunity not to carry with them the old patterns that have created the hurt. I have watched many of my clients create successful new relationships without dragging the old pain and hurt with them. It does require a commitment on my clients behalf of wanting to change and to see that the old hurts don’t have to be re-experienced.
Jo-Anne Baker B.A. M.A. C.Psych. is well known as one of Australia’s leading Sex Entrepreneurs Therapist and Educators. Her business The Pleasure Spot was established in 1993 and was the first in Australia to cater to women and couples sexuality, with a mail order product catalogue. www.pleasurespot.com.au
Grasping the garter belt and panties together, he pulled them down in one swift move.
When she stepped out of them, he paused to sear the moment into his brain. The woman of his dreams stood before him, naked and eager, surrounded by the sedate trappings of a lawyer?s office. The contrast was absolutely delicious and he wanted to savour it before he was swept into a firestorm of need.
When he cupped her sleek bottom and sank to his heels, the thrill of the forbidden made him dizzy. She moaned again, an urgent little sound that told him she was desperate for release. Leaning forward he slid his tongue boldly through her golden curls and tasted paradise.
He moved in closer, getting his shoulders under her thighs as he lifted her to the edge of the desk. As he began to feast, she whimpered and tightened her hold on his scalp. Ah, she was heavenly, melting on his tongue like fine chocolate. He guided her to spread her thighs even more and with a sigh of surrender she obliged him, stretching one leg along the edge of the desk. Papers rustled and drifted to the floor.
He caressed her with his tongue and slid his fingers deep into her wet heat, probing and stroking her to a fever pitch. Her cries grew more intense, her breathing more laboured.
And then the wave broke, filling the small office with the sound of her ecstasy. His groin throbbed with nearly unbearable tension and he longed to rip off his jeans and bury his penis into her quaking vagina. But too much was at stake to risk muting any of the pleasure he wanted to give her. So he followed her all the way through her climax, lapping the nectar of her release and tightening her contractions with the rhythm of his fingers.
At last the tremors eased and her muscles relaxed. Placing his hands at her waist, he steaded her as he kissed a path over her flat stomach. Gradually rising from his knees, he lifted her onto the desk, scattering papers everywhere. The desk phone rattled, but somehow didn?t end up on the floor. She braced her hands behind her and arched her back, as if anticipating his next goal. He took her quivering nipple in his teeth and raked the firm tip gently.
?Yes,? she whispered. ?Oh, yes.?
With one hand supporting the small of her back, he balanced the weight of her breast in the curve of his other hand as he nibbled and sucked.
He could sense she was ready again. Nibbling lightly at her breast, he slid two fingers down through her damp thatch of curls.
With a soft moan of assent, she opened her thighs and invited him inside. Slowly he stroked her, and she tightened around his finger. He?d never been with a woman this hot, this excited.
Increasing the rhythm of his fingers and using his thumb to massage her special hot spot, he gloried in every whimpered cry as she readied for another shattering climax. Within seconds she found it, rocking her hips in time with his strokes and sending yet more papers to the floor.
As she gasped for breath he eased her down until she was sprawled across the desk, her legs dangling off the edge. Moving between her outstretched legs, he leaned over her and braced his hands on either side of her head
?I haven?t even kissed you,? he said, gazing into her heavy-lidded eyes.
She ran her tongue over her lips. ?Kiss me?now.?
?Tell me your name.?
A spark flared in her eyes. ?No.?
?Mine is ? ?
?Come here.? She pulled him toward her waiting mouth and into a kiss so deep, so erotic that his hips began to move as his penis strained to break free of its confinement.
She drew his tongue into her mouth, sucking and toying with it until the urge to be inside her burned every other thought from his brain. Wrenching free of her suggestive kiss, he backed away long enough to get out of his shoes and shuck his jeans and briefs.
After grabbing the condom from the floor, he ripped open the package and rolled latex over his aching penis. He grasped her calves and lifted them so he could hook her ankles around his neck and he?oh, yes, now he could enter the beautiful pink gates of heaven. Hands splayed under her bottom, he watched the tip of his penis slide in, ant that was almost enough to make him come.
He looked into her eyes, and saw the excitement glittering there. ?Remember this tomorrow,? he said and pushed deep.4 Blaze titles are released every month and are available at Big W, Kmart, Target, Borders and selected bookstores. Each title retails for $7.25.