When rationality doesn’t cut it.
If you haven’t got something nice to say…
Just in case you missed the story of the week, James Packer and his ‘best mate’ David Gyngell had a punch-up on the street in Bondi last weekend. SHE‘SAID’s social commentator and ‘token male’ adds his two cents to the drama:
Usually vicious street fighting is reserved for Friday and Saturday nights in Sydney town, where erstwhile males (and, on occasion, females) loaded like freight trains do battle under the moonlit sky to satiate the savage urge coded into their DNA.
On Sunday, conflict spilled onto the café latte-paved streets of the hipster haven known as Bondi. While its residents were deliciously sipping over-priced coffee and discussing the ins and outs of pick-and-mix dressing from four different decades, two best mates with fat wallets and power usually reserved for Harry Potter decided to resort to man’s other primal urge and beat the hell out of one another.
Seemingly the only thing missing from this ‘bro fight’ between Monsieurs Packer and Gyngell was the firm but loving hand of a motherly-type figure to separate them and remind them they are best friends and to stop being stupid.
While one might ponder the how and why of two very public figures playing fisticuffs in a very public place, you only have to look at your own history and remember all the times you slugged it out with your brother or best friend over things that make insignificance look insignificant. Few, if anyone, ever remembers why they got into the fight but all they know is that the part of their DNA that says ‘I’m right and he knows I’m right but won’t admit I’m right so I’m going to punch him til he admits I’m right’ kicked in and the teeth started to fly – regardless of whether it was in your own front yard or Grandma’s Christmas party.
The male desire to prove oneself right through violence is only trumped by his desire to use violence to get what the other bloke has, whether it be the female by his side or the two magic sticks that light fire.
In order to validate this, one only has to look at the history books and see that all wars were started because of either of the above or both. It’s in our DNA. History also shows that once the war is over the parties are friends again, which I believe is still the case with Jamie and David. Any bad blood between them will be washed away after a few beers and a couple of firings at Channel 9 for laughs. (I believe, according to the absent musketeer in all this, one Eddie MacGuire, they call these drunken comedy firings ‘bone-ings’.)
If nothing else, this validates to us lowly mortals that despite the money and power they wield, they are just like the rest of us and will regress to their inner 5-year-old to fight out who gets to play with the train set next.
Image via The Daily Telegraph
By Sean Cunningham
Just in case you have happened to miss the headlines on the covers of the daily papers, the radio and television news reports, and the social media feeds, James Packer and his ‘best mate’ (and former best man) David Gyngell had a punch-up. Clearly this wouldn’t be front-page news if they weren’t multi-millionaires or if they happened to take their scuffle indoors (rather on the photographer-laden streets of Bondi). Neverless, regardless of their respective bank balances, these blokes decided to biff-on.
But really the bout just highlights that men – no matter who they are – are more likely to settle problems with their fists. A human trait that has continued since cavemen times and seems to be an innate response by the testosterone-fuelled male.
The other interesting thing is how much this way of resolving problems differs from the way that women deal with conflict. Packer and Gyngell have both expressed the fact that they are still mates, in a joint statement, and these things can happen sometimes in a friendship that has spanned 35 years.
One of Dr Phil’s tips on managing anger issues is to “stop thinking the world revolves around you”. Maybe that is something that these two could take on board. He also provides a few other golden nuggets of advice that you could impart to the ‘angry man’ in your life.
- Look for warning signs. We don’t blow up out of the blue. Our bodies first exhibit signs, such as a tight chest, butterflies in your stomach, a racing mind, sweaty palms, or getting flush. Recognize the signs so you can intervene before you blow up.
- You may be slowly killing yourself every time you get angry. Any time you’re aroused, the entire chemistry of your body changes, making you more susceptible to ulcers, multiple sclerosis, lupus, arthritis and other illnesses. Use that as motivation to calm down.
- To better manage your anger, recognise that you have a problem. Anger is an outward expression of fear, hurt or frustration. Take anger out of your vocabulary and start to understand what the real problem is.
- Why do angry people lash out? Because they don’t have the words, concepts or abilities to express their frustration in an appropriate way. Consider alternative ways of venting your anger, such as taking a deep breath, aromatherapy or meditation.