Life-and-relationships

Top 5 Life Lessons From The Princess Bride

Cult classic The Princess Bride, which celebrated its 25th anniversary in 2012, still stands the test of time as a hilariously funny fractured fairytale, starring Cary Elwes, Robin Wright, Mandy Patinkin and Billy Crystal.

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And if you’ve never seen the iconic “storybook story” about pirates and princess, giants and swordplay, do yourself a favour and check it out; it’s so hugely popular, the comedy/adventure/satire is passed down from generation-to-generation and the film’s stars are still constantly asked to recite certain iconic lines everywhere they go.

And the revered and much-loved film – based on the William Goldman novel The Princess Bride – has now given rise to a new hit book by the man-in-black himself, Cary Elwes, entitled As You Wish: Inconceivable Tales from the Making of The Princess Bride, released last October.

life lessons, life advice, true love
And, as I recently read it, it struck me that The Princess Bride really does impart humourous and important life lessons we can all learn from:

1. “Get Used To Disappointment”: This is one of my favourite witty lines from the movie and serves as a nice reality check. Life can be disappointing, but The Princess Bride also teaches us to always live in hope and believe in true love.

2. “Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while”: The Princess Bride reminds us that true love is both rare and valuable. And it’s certainly a nice idea to think it can transcend everything – even death.

3. “Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something”: Great life advice again; it pays to always be careful of whose advice you buy, for some people have very false motives.

life lessons, life advice, true love

4. “There’s not a lot of money in revenge”: Sage advice: what does bitterness achieve? No good can come from plotting revenge, certainly not riches, happiness or enlightenment – erm, unless you’re a sword-fighting champion with a vendetta in the film.

5. “Well, who says life is fair? Where is that written? Life isn’t always fair”: In the film, The Grandfather delivers this stern warning to his grandson. And, this witty one-liner from the twisted fairytale applies to everyday life too: life can be cruel, but we should never waste the pretty and/or lose sight of the good in ourselves, others and the world around us.

Main image via drafthouse.com; secondary image via www.mixiecinema.com; final image via neongods.com.

January 12, 2015

Weekend Wit: Men and Menstruation

Men. They really are strange. The way they make decisions, their behavior, what they pay attention to and how they go about things makes the female mind boggle! Take menstruation for example. What is it about women’s periods that freaks them out and has them running for the nearest exit?

For example, if you are chatting on the phone to a friend or have your BFF over for coffee, a sure-fire way to stop any man from eavesdropping on your conversation is to throw in the topic of your menstrual cycle. It’s like female Kryptonite! They’ve overheard the word period and they leave the vicinity faster than Superman on a mission. (Tip: Don’t forget to use this one to your advantage!)

Then there’s buying feminine hygiene products for female partners. This is possibly the one incidence whereby gay men are envied by heterosexual males. If your fella is like most of his comrades, this is the one request he could probably do without.

Yes, he will need to walk into the shop and find his way to the feminine hygiene section. Challenge number one. Once there, he will likely be completely overwhelmed when he is instantly confronted with – a wall of feminine hygiene options. Pure horror for the average bloke. Super, regular, flow related, wings, no wings; all of which he knows nothing about. Challenge number two.

Although preferred products are usually neatly placed in her section of the bathroom cabinet – which is shared and he actually opens each day – he chooses not to see them. This is a man skill learned and passed down through generations with utter perfection. The products are there but the connection between his eyes and brain are severed when it comes to anything related to feminine hygiene. (Tip: This is where to hide your own private collection of sex toys because he’ll never see them!)

Back to challenge number two. Men can go either one of two ways when it comes to selecting tampons for their lady. If a man chooses a super-sized product, he has done so with his anatomy is mind. During the selection process, he has come to the assumption that the size of the tampon reflects how endowed he believes he is. If he can fit inside that vagina, it must need a super-sized tampon. Yes, ladies, that’s the logic!

If the man selects the regular or smaller variety, he has done so with her anatomy in mind. These products have been selected because he wants to believe her lady bits, are too small for super-sized products. The thought of his lady using super-sized tampons is a concept he just doesn’t want to envisage. Once again, male logic at work. How on earth was the wheel or electricity ever invented?

Whatever rationale he uses to make the selection; he then finds his way to the checkout. Challenge number three. Some men feel a bit awkward about this. The big question is why? Everyone knows the product isn’t for him. Not unless he’s hiding a vagina in his pants! Maybe there lies the fear?

Despite all men knowing that women bleed once a month, it’s not something the vast majority want to delve into any further. Why any man would want to become a gynecologist is a pure mystery. Maybe they have a defective male gene, assume women visiting the gynecologist aren’t menstruating or something along those lines. Remember, we are dealing with male logic and decision making, so who knows, and most of these men would say women are strange!

October 25, 2014

Bad Break-up? How To Move On

Break-ups can feel like a death, except there is no funeral to go to and no gravesite to visit. It’s sheer grief, despair, loneliness and isolation. Sound familiar? There’s no quick fix and there’s no one size fits all way to cope; but nevertheless, you need to find a way and move on.

Grieve

Each person experiences grief differently. As long as it doesn’t affect your mental and physical health, do what you have done in the past when you have experienced a loss. For some, it will be the first time they have experienced this intense emotion. Check out this article on coping with grief for more information.

Time

Give yourself time to heal. Rebound relationships might take your mind off your ex, but it will be extra baggage you may need to deal with. Plus, is it unfair to the person you choose to rebound to. There is no designated time limit on how long you need to give yourself, but if you’ve been in a long term relationship, be aware it will take some time to learn to adjust to life without them.

Distance

Distancing yourself from your ex is essential. Avoid going to places where they might be, calling or texting them or listening to saved voice messages. All this will add to your pain and prolong your ability to move on. Plus, this is initially how stalking can develop. Listening to music which reminds you of them or looking at photos might be something you choose to do as you grieve but long-term this can be really unhealthy.

If you have mutual friends, avoid asking about your ex. If they choose to discuss your ex and it’s making you uncomfortable; politely ask them to stop. It would be better for you to choose to associate with your friends, rather than mutual friends, in initial stages. If you want to retain a friendship with them ask them to give you some time while to work through the break-up.

Look after your health

People often pick up addictive behaviours after a bad break-up, such as drinking, drugs or gambling. Avoid trying to block the pain with substances or overeating, as this can quickly become an exceptionally unhealthy coping mechanism. Look for healthy alternatives to fill the void you are experiencing. Be aware of how you have coped with stress and pain previously. If it’s been unhealthy, catch yourself quickly.

Moving forward

At some stage after the break-up, you will begin to feel better. The tears will flow less, emotions around the break-up will dissipate and life without your ex will become normal. At this stage, you can look toward the future.

Instead of rushing into the arms of the next waiting stranger, take things nice and slow. Although sex makes us all feel great, it can have the opposite effect if you are still hooked on another person. Date on a casual basis and, if you find someone you’d like to get to know better, do that. Take sex off the table for a while and develop a friendship first. Really get to know if this person is right for you or if you are needing them to fill a void.

Even though the initial stages of a break-up are exceptionally painful and difficult, love is the greatest experience a person can have. Life will go on and a new type of normal will emerge. You never know, as one door closes, another one will open. This is the adventure of this thing we call living.

October 7, 2014

Book Review: Spellbound

If you have read any of Jane Green?s previous five novels then you will love her latest offering Spellbound. She never fails to entertain the girls at SheSaid.

Jane Green writes fresh, funny, heartwarming novels for woman of today. Her central characters are always female and they remind you either of yourself at some point in your life or at least one of your closet girlfriends. She has a way with words that really draws you in and makes you feel like you know the characters. You totally sympathise with them as they go through the trials and tribulations of life, love, sex and even marriage.Spellbound is an easy read that?s hard to put down. It?s as if you are, as the title suggests, somewhat spellbound by her storytelling. Alice, the main character is married to Joe Chambers, the handsome, successful banker. (Don?t we all wish!) They lead a charmed existence in London, attending all the best parties and openings, and being photographed for the social pages. Secretly, Alice dreams of a quieter life with more QT (quality time) with her gorgeous, rich husband. She?s is also wracked with self-doubt and sometimes can?t help but pinch herself that Joe chose to marry her ?plain old Alice?.

Meanwhile, Alice?s best friend Emily is leading the 30-something single life that Alice always imagined would be hers, instead of this fantasy life as the fabulous wife of Joe Chambers?Then Joe is transferred to New York and Alice finally gets her dream house in the country. But like most things you dream of for a long time, this comes at a cost.

Spellbound follows Alice?s journey of self-discovery. It?s a universal story about the ups and downs of life and relationships, told by Green with warmth, laughter and even a little sadness.

A great holiday read or a book to send a girlfriend that needs cheering up! A book that ensures you feel happy with your lot in life regardless of what that is at any given time. Well worth a read!

Buy Spellbound from the SheSaid Bookshop.

February 11, 2003