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Pillow Talk – A beginner’s guide

Revving up your motor mouth during sex can add another dimension to the experience. Think seductive, sensual, and raunchy – and don’t forget to have fun! You don’t have to swallow a dictionary to make it work!

Test the water

Not every person enjoys the same terminology during sex talk. Some like it soft, some strong, kind of like sex itself really. In general, guys don’t mind a bit of rough talk in the bedroom, so you really needn’t be too concerned about stronger language. But be warned, if you’re going to use clinical terms, the guy’s gonna think he’s in a Sex Ed class! Start tame and work your way up. Conversely, if his sexual vocabulary offends you, ask if he can tone it down a notch.

Tone of voice

Try lowering the tone of your voice and notice how much sexier and breathier it sounds. It’s also more secretive, more intimate and more inviting ? if he has to listen better to hear you, he’s going to have to come closer. Squealing “oh baby, oh baby” at high range is only going to wake the neighbours and you don’t want him rushing to get finished quickly so no one calls the police!


Let yourself go, girl! Breathe, moan, pant. The language of love and sex is not made up entirely of words.

Good Vibrations

Try moaning while performing oral sex on him. The vibrations will do wonders!


Your lips, his lips. Not quite touching, but try speaking some sexy words into his mouth. Your breath on his lips is very sensual, and prolonging the wait before the kiss actually happens is highly tantalising.


Whispering sweet nothings in his ear can send a tingle down his spine and a surge to his groin. Start teasing when you’re out somewhere together and escalate the suggestions on your way home. When you get him naked, tell him to lie still and let you whisper him into a frenzy.

Pillow Talk – A Beginner’s Guide (contd)


Talking about your sexual fantasies in bed is a great way to steam up the windows. You can even have story time, where each of you contributes to the story and builds it into something worthy of the X-rated video industry.Degradation is OUT

Things can get a bit heated up, naturally, but demeaning comments are unwelcome. Digging your nails into your guy’s back and calling him uncomplimentary names won’t score you any brownie points. Likewise, if he starts labelling you in unpleasant terms, chances are, he’s going to get your nails down his back anyway! Of course, it depends on the couple, but best not to go too far until you know who’s comfortable with what, or things could get out of hand.

What to say

Tell him how you love what he does to you and how he makes you feel.

  • Explain how you’ve been desperate to be alone with him all day, all week or since you met.
  • While touching him all over, ask if he likes this, or that, and wait for him to answer.
  • Say his name.
  • Compliment him on his body, his kissing, the way he uses his tongue or hands, or how he smells.
  • Don’t forget to mention the obvious body part, and how you like it!


What not to say

  • Anything that can wait till afterwards!
  • How hot his best friend is.
  • How you’ve had better!
  • Perhaps he should try a different brand of toothpaste or deodorant.
  • Are you horny because of me, or just horny in general?
  • Are you in yet?

By Gina Luca

* Gina is a freelance writer whose passion for talking to people on the Internet provides much inspiration for her writing.