It’s like getting an online shopping package delivered, but 10 times sexier.
Everything you need to know about playing in the backyard…
Nobody will be any the wiser…
It’s time to get frisky.
You decide it’s time to spice up your love life, but there isn’t a sex toy in sight. Maybe you’re staying the night at bae’s and your whole naughty kit and caboodle is stashed under your bed at home, or maybe you’re strapped for cash and can’t rationalize blowing $200 on a vibrator.
Thankfully, as it turns out, there are a plethora of everyday household items that can be used as sex toys.
It’s important to be inventive in the bedroom to keep things interesting, but you don’t have to spend hundreds of dollars to get off in fun new ways. In fact, the possibilities are pretty much endless when you get creative with what you already have in your home.
Just be cautious, as risks always exist with any improvized sex toy. You don’t want your night of passion ending up in the emergency room. So always be clean, cautious, and go easy.
Whether you’re playing alone or have someone to join in on the fun, here are eight household objects that’ll help you get to Pleasure Town even faster…
The most phallic of vegetables, everyone seems to have one in their crisper. And the girth and length of the cucumber makes for a perfect DIY dildo. Add the coldness of being in the fridge, and you have an extra stimulating toy at the ready. Just ensure it’s washed and used with a condom, and definitely don’t serve it to your dinner guests afterwards.
2. Kitchen spatula
A multi-use kitchen utensil most of us use to whip up post-coitus pancakes with, now your humble spatula can help put you in the mood, too. Spatulas are smooth in texture and non-sharp, so perfect for stroking the body with and then delivering a nice swift spank. To find your spanking threshold, simply start soft and work your way up in intensity.
You could spend your pay packet on the latest G-Spot stimulator, or you could head to your fruit bowl and improvize instead. Bananas are curved perfectly to hit your G-Spot with little effort required – just make sure you put a condom on first and use one that’s fairly firm. Alternatively, a banana skin makes the perfect sheath for guys to slide their penis in and out of for ultimate stimulation during foreplay.
4. Hair brush
Why not get ready in the morning then take your beauty tools back to bed with you? A hair brush can tickle and tease all of the erogenous zones of the body quite like nothing else can. Go soft or hard bristle, or even mix it up by swapping between the two; then work in circular motions over the body to get the blood pumping in all the right places.
5. Shower head
Warm rushing water on your clitoris is a guaranteed way to get off quickly and cost-free when you’re home alone. Alternatively, using your shower time as a pre-sex warm-up to get you in the mood is a great way to get clean and dirty with your SO at the same time…
6. Washing machine
For the times when you’re feeling a little lazy, let your washing machine do the hard work for you. Sitting on the washing machine while having sex will vibrate your entire body, giving you a head-to-toe earth-shattering orgasm. You’re welcome.
Chill metal spoons in the freezer then massage them over your partner’s erogenous zones (read: lips, nipples, thighs) for a sexy foreplay sesh that’s oh-so cool.
Whoever thought the clothespins you use to hang out your clothes would make a fun little BDSM toy? Excellent for heightening sensation play during sex, or by yourself, clothespins applied gently to nipples can delicately squeeze and entice. Just be careful taking them off so as not to do damage.
Images via giphy.com and tumblr.com.
Comment: What household items have you discovered also double as DIY sex toys?
Man, I feel like a woman.
Why is a happy ending so hard to come by?
No longer the realm of dirty basements or teenage boys rooms, masturbating, Sex And The City style, is all the rage! We can all channel our inner Samantha or Carrie if we’re after a little more subtlety, and are wanting to find pleasure in places other than a mans groin.
The art of masturbation, however, eludes too many of us, so for the novices out there, here are 5 things no one tells you about masturbating.
It’s not some weird thing only creepy perverts or 40-year-old virgins do
We all do it and we certainly shouldn’t feel bad about it. Your doctor does it (hopefully no where nearby), your bestie does it, even your Mum does it (although that’s one you probably shouldn’t think about too much). The point is, masturbation is a fact of life, just go with it.
Playing with your vulva for hours while binging on Netflix counts as masturbating
If you’re touching yourself an enjoying it, it doesn’t matter that you aren’t convulsing from back-to-back explosive orgasms, you’re still masturbating. Orgasms are not the defining characteristic of masturbation, you can still find pleasure from touching yourself and learn a little about your g-spot without orgasming.
If you have a boyfriend and you masturbate, you’re not a cheating skank
Even if you love the person you’re with and they always know exactly how to get you off, you shouldn’t feel guilty for seeking a little private pleasure of your own. Hell, they’re probably getting themselves off all the time, too! Also, skanks aren’t really a thing – so let’s just forget about this misconception entirely.
Using sex toys doesn’t make you the world’s worst masturbator
As a general rule of thumb, sex toys will always trump hands. You can’t magically make your fingers vibrate, and when you’re tired and just want a quickie, a quality vibrator will work wonders for your libido. That said, however…
A super expensive Triple G-Spot Orgasm Monster Sex Toy isn’t compulsory
The best thing about masturbating is that it’s free. Take a little time to learn what works with your hands, the free-est sex toy ever. It will also help you to learn what you like for when you get the real deal with your partner, or that cute guy you met at a bar after one too many drinks.
Image via Cosmopolitan
Remember the hilarious Sex And The City episode when prudish Charlotte became no enamoured with her “rabbit vibrator” – that she didn’t leave her house for days and her BFFs had to perform an intervention? Do yourself a favour and check it out if you’ve never seen it.
But can a new buzzy friend for your top drawer actually strengthen your relationship, as well as boosting your sex life? Ooh yes, yes, yes!
That’s the finding of the inaugural Durex Sexsus Report – an online study conducted this June among more than 1000 Australian men and women aged 18-39.
Key report findings include:
- Three in five (59 per cent) respondents who own a sex toy feel more intimate with their partner when using it.
- Aussies are “getting busy” using their sex toys a whopping 3.6 times a week.
- Four out of five Australians believe it’s more acceptable to discuss sex toys than ever before, but more than half wish they owned one but are too afraid to try it out.
- Men are more likely to purchase a sex toy for their partner’s enjoyment, or to increase intimacy with their partner.
- Women are more likely than men to buy a sex toy for their own pleasure.
In addition, the warmer weather in Queensland makes for hotter sex too: the “sunshine state” is getting more buzzed in the bedroom than any other Australian state or territory – 70 per cent versus the national average of 62 per cent.
The findings – which coincide with the launch of Durex’s new adult toy range via www.durex.com.au/adult-toys – reveal couples are achieving a new level of playfulness, passion and intimacy into the bedroom, says Durex Brand Manager Suzanne Legg.
“Adult toys are a completely normal and healthy part of our sex lives,” Ms Legg says. “The Durex Sexsus Report confirms what our sexy-radar has been telling us for a while – adult toys are no longer a taboo.
“It’s fantastic to see that more than three quarters of Aussies believe adult toys open up a whole new spectrum of sensual possibilities – we’re really pleased intimate pleasure is being taken seriously between the sheets.
“For those who are still a little shy, the new range of Durex adult toys are available online and delivered super-discreetly to service the one in four respondents who have not bought a toy because they feel too uncomfortable going in to a store.”
From vibrating massagers and bullets through to sensational rabbit vibrators, the toys are ergonomically and elegantly crafted with a velvet-soft finish (pictured). Prices range from $49.99 for the Durex Teasing Touch stroker, through to $149.99 for the Durex Extreme Thrill rabbit vibrator (pictured).
And Sydney sexologist, Dr Michelle Mars (pictured), who specialises in the sociology of sex gender and sexual well-being, concurs: she too believes sex toys are good for relationships.
“Sex toys add a bit of excitement to a relationship and can liven up your love life – as long as it’s a good quality sex toy and not a novelty item; make sure you do your research to get the full effects of a high-quality one,” Dr Mars says.
“You don’t want hard, inflexible sex toys and make sure you also use a good quality lube and the right kind of lube for your particular sex toy. A good lube is a bit stringy and you want to use a different one for vaginal sex than anal sex. Anal lubes can cause changes in the pH of your vagina so you need to be careful that you use them carefully and don’t cross-contaminate.
“Sex toys can take you outside of your comfort zone, increase your pleasure and expand your repertoire.”
Selfies have come further in the past 18 months than anyone could have anticipated, and now, there’s a new kid on the block. Enter (pardon the pun) the age of vaginal selfies, or vagelfies. No longer content on taking selfies of the outer regions of the body, women are sending intimate pics of their private parts to partners, and into cyberspace!
With each new trend comes a new wave of technology. There are now two unique adult toys ready to capture the ultimate vagelfies, plus a playful addition for couples to have some intimate fun with.
The Sex Selfie Stick, as it’s been playfully named, is a great little toy for couples that brings technology into the bedroom. Just as the adopted name implies, it’s a 165mm x 25 mm rigid silicon vibrator which comes in three colours, violet (pictured), black and khaki.
The one major difference is it has a built-in camera lens and LED light at the tip. This is to illuminate the otherwise dark nether-regions which only gynecologists have had the opportunity to see. It can also be used for women who want to investigate their vaginal region if they have any health concerns such as cysts.
The Sex Selfie Stick is priced at around $185 and has been a massive hit. Sexploration now has a whole new meaning and couples and singles are having more fun than never before. Plus, this brings a whole new dimension to sexting and phone sex. Apparently orgasmic contractions can be captured on screen and sent into cyberspace –great for long distance relationships or keeping it fresh!
As far as vagelfies go some are proudly sharing their pics and videos online. Did you know that there’s a website for that?! The downside of this neat little toy has been the need for the cable and being attached to a computer during camera operation. However, manufacturers have rectified this by producing the Siime Eye – a product that has all the original features but the versatility of wireless use. Coming in at around $80, that’s probably more the go!
Users have been exceptionally impressed with both models and the response has been overwhelming. Who would have thought so many people would want a birds-eye vision of their vagina!? Some did argue after the release of the original model, however, that their selfie or belfie sticks could take similar shots.
So, if you want to see how it works, you can view the demo on YouTube. And lastly, if you want to purchase the sex gadget, ask your local adult sex-toy shop if they stock it or head to SVOKOM for more information.
There’s no doubt that this is the latest in sex toys, and given the response, what’s the bet that this is just the tip of the iceberg in sex toys to come!
Images via svakom.net
Does the G-Spot actually exist? And, if so, where the hell is it?
Never fear, dear readers, SHE SAID has got the fast facts on this one. This common sex myth irks Sydney sexologist, Dr Michelle Mars no end. For Dr Mars – who specialises in the sociology of sex gender and sexual well-being – says that despite many scientific claims to the contrary, the G-spot does in fact exist! “Best scientific evidence is that it does exist!” Dr Mars says.
“Science backs up my own experiences on this one. In an article published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine in 2012, a group of experts concluded that ‘the assumption that women may experience only the clitoral, external orgasm is not based on the best available scientific evidence’.
“I think it’s a myth that it doesn’t exist because a lot of knowledge about female pleasure has been lost over the centuries and the idea that clitoral stimulation is required for orgasm has become pervasive.
“Women who gushed a lot were embarrassed and sometimes not sure they had urinated.
“Plus, not everyone knows how to do it so it might be something that only happens occasionally. We think sex is something you just do not something you can learn about!”
The G-spot, also called the Gräfenberg spot (after German gynecologist Ernst Gräfenberg), is said to be an erogenous area of the vagina that, when stimulated, may lead to strong sexual arousal, powerful orgasms and potential female ejaculation. So, where the bloody hell is it, exactly? “It’s a cluster of nerve endings near the entrance of the vagina,” Dr Mars says.“Some women are more aware of sensation than others.
“The G-spot is about two inches inside the vagina toward the front of a woman’s body.”
Dr Mars’ best sexpert advice in finding the G-spot is to tread carefully. So, do couples need to use a torch? “No!” she laughs. “If you’re exploring the G-spot, take the time to make it sexy, go slow, go in shallow, get the angle right, in and up. Keep the pressure firm.
“Be aware that it can take time; getting better at any kind of sex doesn’t happen overnight.
“It’s very obvious for some people, but for some women it’s just a dribble and they may not be aware of extra moisture until they stand up and move around.”
So, can you survive sex – indeed life – without experiencing G-spot vaginal ejaculation? “It’s another kind of pleasure, partners feel pleasure when they make their partners feel good,” Dr Mars says. “Learning to have fun with the G-spot is important because it opens up new avenues of pleasure and stimulates new neural pathways for pleasure.”
And ladies (and men) if you still need help finding the elusive G-spot, Dr Mars says there are a plethora of sex toys specifically designed to stimulate it. But she still really, really wants you to do your homework and find the damn thing. “Like great kitchen appliances, sex toys don’t make up for knowing what you’re doing,” she says. “For those who prefer vibrators, this is a good couple toy to play with: The Thrill Clit, G-spot and Anal Vibrator from We-Vibe.”
Interestingly, Dr Mars says that while only women have G-spots, men have what’s called a “P-spot”. Stay tuned for more on that soon, ladies.
What do you think? Have you found the G-spot?
Images, in order, via femamom.com; www.bodysculptor.com and abcnews.go.com.
“Trust me?” he asks.
I nod. He holds out his hand, and in his palm are two shiny silver balls linked with a thick black thread.
“These are new,” he says emphatically.
I look questioningly up at him.
“I am going to put these inside of you, and then I’m going to spank you, not for punishment, but for your pleasure and mine.” – Fifty Shades of Grey
Ben Wa Balls, Kegal Balls, Luna Beads, Burmese bells, Orgasm Balls, Geisha Balls: call them what you will, but these small, marble-sized weighted balls now have a centre-stage role thanks to erotic blockbuster Fifty Shades of Grey.
The extract above is from the 2011 E L James bestselling book. It remains to be seen if the sex balls, as I like to call them, will feature as prominently in the highly anticipated film adaptation due out around February 12.
The first book in the erotic trilogy, about a virginal 21-year-old college gal and the 27-year-old billionaire who love a bit of rough play, Fifty Shades has caused sales of sex toys, bondage and S&M gear to skyrocket both nationally and internationally. And the classic Ben Wa Balls, or various versions of them, have been flying off the shelves too, ever since.
The weighted balls are worn inside the vagina and have long been used to strengthen pelvic floor muscles – but can they, as Fifty Shades of Grey’s female protagonist Anastasia Steele experiences – also bring you to orgasm?
In the book, Anastasia suddenly turns nympho – “needy for sex” – after wearing said balls and almost has an orgasm after infamous male protagonist Christian Grey “jerks them out…suddenly”.
So, can we expect the same, if we wear the balls in real life? Sadly, no.
Leading Australian sexologist Dr Nikki Goldstein says do your research before use when it comes to the balls and, importantly, they’re not recommended for young girls. “On a pelvic floor basis, these balls are great,” Dr Goldstein says. “They can strengthen your muscles and aid bladder control.
“They’re also great if you forget to do your pelvic floor exercises (also called Kegel exercises).”
But what about the big O? Surely, Fifty Shades of Grey’s famous sex scene isn’t a fake?! Dr Goldstein says strong pelvic floor muscles can help you to have more orgasms, and strengthen the intensity of your big Os, but as for the balls themselves, it’s not the usual practice for them to be used for sexual enjoyment. What the hell E L James?!
“For some people, the more weighted ones can put pressure on the vaginal canal and rub on the G-spot,” she says. “And some people also insert them in the vaginal canal during anal sex.
“But I’d be reluctant to tell people to use them exclusively for sexual pleasure.”
Note well, ladies: do not put the sex balls in your anus as there’s a high likelihood the balls will, erm, disappear, according to Dr Goldstein.
So, what’s the moral of the story here, ladies?
“Do not use Fifty Shades of Grey as a text book on sex!” Dr Goldstein says. “It’s a fantasy novel, not a sex education book.
“But it just goes to show that people are craving information about sex topics.
“My final advice would be definitely do not expect to almost have an orgasm just by using the balls.”
Does spanking by a hot man help?
For more information on Dr Goldstein, visit drnikki.com.au.
What do you think? Have you tried using the sex balls?
Secondary image via fiftyshadesaddicted.com; book image via www.npr.org and cartoon via www.wheresmyglow.com.
If you have a pair of handcuffs and looking to spice up your sex life, we have 4 creative & sexy ideas for sex with handcuffs! They are fast becoming a default sex toy for couples. The issue with such widespread use is that couples have probably role played them to death in the bedroom.
There are only so many times you can be cuffed to a bed post before it gets a little stale. Coming up with something new and exciting might be a bit tricky. Maybe that’s why bondage and sales of bondage toys are on the rise? (Hmmm… that’s another conversation.) Anyway, assuming the bedroom has probably been fully explored, lets consider the rest of the house and see if we can come up with something new for you.
Look but don’t touch
Now the bathroom usually has a towel rack or something similar. So do kitchens. Handcuff both hands together and tease your partner while you take a seductive shower, do a strip tease or masturbate in front of him. Being cuffed to the wall will ensure they look, but don’t touch. This one will drive him absolutely crazy because men are so visual. When you’re ready, un-cuff him and let him join in.
Behind the door
Some doors have coat racks or something similar attached to hang items. Why not make that item your partner! Put both hands in cuffs and slide the center links over the door. Depending on their height it might be a bit of a stretch, so women can be hoisted up onto their partner, arms in the air, and he can take control. It can be done either facing toward or away from the door. The door behind you will provide resistance and some support. Alternately use the door nob if the hanger is just too high. It won’t have the same effect but it will provide another experience.
If you want to try the hanger, you can get portable versions which are held in place when the door shuts. If you want to add to the excitement, why not hook one over the front door and hope someone comes knocking.
If you have stairs and a pair of handcuffs you’re in luck, providing they reach around the area you’re being cuffed to. Get your man to cuff you to the stairs while you kneel on the steps. If they aren’t carpeted, improvise so you don’t end up with scuffed knees. One hand will need to be free for you to balance. When he’s ready, he can enter from behind. If you wear a skirt or dress without underwear, he won’t be able to resist for long, particularly if you tease him!
Sex in the shower/bath/spa
Some handcuffs have been made with suction cups especially for use in water or resistance against most porous surfaces including tile, glass, cars and even wood. They resist any pulling or struggling and can be placed around the wrist or ankles.
If you want to give these a try, get your partner to position you exactly where they want you or vice-versa. The suction actually makes it safer to have sex in the shower, bath or spa, plus gives you both something a little extra to hold onto. As they can be used on many different surfaces, why not try attaching to the fridge or maybe the washing machine while it’s vibrating. Get creative and don’t forget car bonnets, widows, doors and anything else you discover works.
Lastly, don’t forget the portability of the humble handcuff. If you want to take these outside or even out in public (providing you don’t get caught!) it will give you another experience. Don’t just limit sex with handcuffs to the bedroom, explore and get creative!
Image via web-images.chacha.com
The key to great sex is great foreplay. Plain and simple. When you first hook up with a partner the foreplay can last for hours. The two of you are up all night talking, kissing and canoodling your way to passionate love-making. Neither of you care that you’ve had no sleep and need to get up for work in the morning. You’re both running on adrenaline. Awesome, isn’t it?!
After you guys have been together for a while, you can begin to lose that passionate honeymoon spark. No one intentionally sets out to lose it, but the lust you once had for each other develops into a deeper love. Hey, there’s nothing wrong with love but it can replace lust. Somewhere along the way lovemaking turns into a quickie whenever you can find the time.
Quite often, women are left feeling unsatisfied and the foreplay, which initiates sex can get monotonous and boring. It all becomes like a routine. Let me tell you, it doesn’t have to. It’s after deep love develops that you should actually be having better sex than when you first hooked up. If you’re not, you’re probably skimping on the foreplay and heading straight to the happy ending. So what’s a girl to do?
This is where fun enters the equation. “Fun” can look like a lot of different things to different people. I’ve got a few suggestions to get you started:
Now role play can be whatever you like. It might involve costumes like a scantily clad maid or nurse. Play the part and lose yourself in the fantasy. Lots of ladies like a man in uniform so get him to dress up like a fireman, cop, doctor or whatever your fantasy is. The key is to have fun while you’re doing it.
Role play can be played outside the home as well. You might want your partner to pick you up from a bar or nightclub, and pretend to be strangers, meet up in a dark picture theatre, whatever floats ya boat. Remember though, if you get caught having sex in public you can get charged with a criminal offense, so just a word of warning; be discrete!
Fun might consist of a bit of bondage. You don’t need to go the whole way, like dressing in rubber suits or buying sex related furniture and props. Unless you want to, of course. Tie each other up with scarf’s or belts and maybe grab a pair of handcuffs. Once again, play the part and lose yourself in the fantasy.
Add sex toys
Add some toys to your sex life. There are thousands of different items on the market. Why not jump online together, have a laugh and talk about what you’d like to try and purchase a few. That in itself can be great foreplay if you discuss what you’d like to do to each other.
Purchase sex games
You can buy sex related board and card games which give you both the opportunity to take turns giving and receiving. If you find talking about sex difficult, these sorts of games can get you to open up and be able to communicate your needs and wants to your partner. They are also a great way to introduce new activities to try out together.
Home-made sex games
A great game to play together is the scavenger hunt. Go around the house individually and meet back in the bedroom with what you’ve found to use as sex toys. You might want to try naked blind man’s bluff. One of you has on a blindfold and tries to reach out and find the other. What about strip poker? Turning everyday kids and adult games into sex games can be a lot of fun. Dig deep into your imagination and discover what you can both come up with.
These activities I’ve listed are just the tip of the foreplay iceberg. Have fun together, laugh, get creative and be daring. If you have any other fun foreplay ideas, please feel free to share them. We’d all love to hear about how you and your partner are getting creative and putting the fun back into foreplay!
Image via galleryplus.ebayimg.com/ws/web/121254363098_1_0_1/1000×1000.jpg