Valentine’s Day 101 With Zoe Foster
February 14 might be a day filled with romance, but not according to the majority of young Aussies.
The NAB Relationships Survey has found that just over half of young Australians between 18 to 39 years do not like the day, with 37% finding it a cynical invention by greeting card companies! And they say romance is dead?
Relationship commentator and author Zoë Foster said that while for some young people in a relationship the day can be out wining and dining, it is also a time when couples assess the health of their relationship, and look at their options.
“Between new year and February 14th is a time when many evaluate whether their relationships are right for them.” Almost half of young people will actually break up with their partner around Valentine’s Day – it’s almost what you could consider ‘break-up season’.
“Trust, respect and honesty are all of incredible importance. So, if your partner has cheated, or you’re feeling its run it course, or you just don’t bring out the best in each other, perhaps it’s time to move on.” said Zoë.
The most common reason for terminating a relationship is the realisation that they were not compatible (60%). Other relationships were ended because of the belief that their partner had changed (43%) or else the spark had gone (43%).
Zoe give SheSaid the lowdown on love, break-ups and what women really want for Valentine’s Day…
?1. Valentine’s Day: none of us really believe in it but we’re seriously annoyed if we don’t get anything. Should we fight it or just give in to it?
?It’s coming whether you like it or not, so you may as well do something fun. Use the occasion to do show your lover how thoughtful and adorable you can be, it needn’t cost much at all – a love note written with a Sharpie on the bathroom mirror and delicious French toast in bed could be the most romantic thing they’ve ever experienced.
?2. Breaking up before Valentine’s Day: poor form or seize the day?
As the NAB Relationship survey showed, almost 50% of young people choose to break up around February 14. “Around” being the operative word. On the actual day is pretty callous, in my opinion. (Also, you’ll earn yourself a bad reputation and some kind of terrible nickname like, ‘The A-hole,’ or ‘The Mega Bitch.’)
??3. 1 in 4 people believe Valentine’s Day makes single people feel bad about themselves. What are your best tips for singles for Feb 14??
Rebel! Have a marvellously fun night out with some other fun singles (involve many margaritas if possible) and play fun games like, ‘Worst Ever Date’ and ‘What Would Your Life Be Like If You’d Ended Up With That Jerk Called (insert name).’
?4. Flowers, chocolates, corny cards, it’s all so last century. What are some thoroughly modern gift suggestions for women??
Something thoughtful. Any guy can fork out $50 for flowers (and it’s still encouraged, for the record) but doing something specific to your lady, that shows you thought about it and want to make them smile, is priceless. It could be a cooking class in their favourite cuisine, (or cooking them their favourite meal), or a gorgeous photo album made from all your best photos together, or a memory stick full of all her favourite TV shows and movies and music. Put in a bit of time and work, and your gesture will stay with her forever.
?5. …And what do you guys really want for Valentine’s Day?
Honestly? Probably to not have to ‘do’ Valentines day – sitting in a restaurant with a bunch of other couple playing three times as much for the same food just because it’s February 14 doesn’t thrill too many men. Let him off with a home cooked meal or a hire a mobile massage company to come Swedish massage you both instead.
?6. Would you consider Valentine’s Day proposals romantic or corny??
Predictable. And why would you want to share your special Day of Love with every other rascal in the world? Go wild and do it on February 15 instead.
?7. Describe the ultimate anti-Valentine’s Day?
February 14. Well, looking at the NAB relationships survey and how disenchanted and break-upy so many young people are on around this day, it seems that February 14 is pretty anti-Valentines these days, isn’t it? (Oooh, so post-modern!)
?8. Fess up, what are you planning for this Valentine’s Day?
My boyfriend is overseas, so I’ll probably guzzle some delicious wine with my girlfriends. (Or crash someone’s romantic dinner.)
What are your Valentine’s Day confessions? Ever broken up with someone just before the day? Or are you a hopeless romantic and love nothing more than roses and candelit dinners?
Watch Zoe discuss her best relationship tips here!