Just in case you have happened to miss the headlines on the covers of the daily papers, the radio and television news reports, and the social media feeds, James Packer and his ‘best mate’ (and former best man) David Gyngell had a punch-up. Clearly this wouldn’t be front-page news if they weren’t multi-millionaires or if they happened to take their scuffle indoors (rather on the photographer-laden streets of Bondi). Neverless, regardless of their respective bank balances, these blokes decided to biff-on.
But really the bout just highlights that men – no matter who they are – are more likely to settle problems with their fists. A human trait that has continued since cavemen times and seems to be an innate response by the testosterone-fuelled male.
The other interesting thing is how much this way of resolving problems differs from the way that women deal with conflict. Packer and Gyngell have both expressed the fact that they are still mates, in a joint statement, and these things can happen sometimes in a friendship that has spanned 35 years.
One of Dr Phil’s tips on managing anger issues is to “stop thinking the world revolves around you”. Maybe that is something that these two could take on board. He also provides a few other golden nuggets of advice that you could impart to the ‘angry man’ in your life.
- Look for warning signs. We don’t blow up out of the blue. Our bodies first exhibit signs, such as a tight chest, butterflies in your stomach, a racing mind, sweaty palms, or getting flush. Recognize the signs so you can intervene before you blow up.
- You may be slowly killing yourself every time you get angry. Any time you’re aroused, the entire chemistry of your body changes, making you more susceptible to ulcers, multiple sclerosis, lupus, arthritis and other illnesses. Use that as motivation to calm down.
- To better manage your anger, recognise that you have a problem. Anger is an outward expression of fear, hurt or frustration. Take anger out of your vocabulary and start to understand what the real problem is.
- Why do angry people lash out? Because they don’t have the words, concepts or abilities to express their frustration in an appropriate way. Consider alternative ways of venting your anger, such as taking a deep breath, aromatherapy or meditation.